A Discussion of Implements

Implements are a vast unexplored frontier in my mind. It's odd that I read about other people's experience with implements and I grow a bit envious. Perhaps it's one of those things where the grass seems greener on the other side. But I know I've mentioned how much I LOATHE the light saber. In that respect, I guess it's good for the intended purpose. However, I do wish for a bit of variety I guess?

We actually just had a discussion today about implements as I've been having some pain in my lower back/butt/leg. I DON'T think it's spanking induced. One, I've not had many spankings lately to really cause such a thing. Two, I think it is possibly sciatica caused by an epidural with my first son's birth. I never had the pain prior to his birth and it has come and gone ever since. It just seems to have flare ups now and then. Anyways, but the fact that the pain is currently flared up brought up an implement discussion as my hubby does NOT want to be the cause of further pain or injury. In other words, he's okay with short-term pain, but not any sort of lasting damage. And of course, that's where I'm at with it too. So it seems this discussion led into implements and I did express a concern that with the light saber being so thin, if it were to hit the right spot, there could be potential to exacerbate the injury. I don't know if this is really true or not, but it would seem to make sense anyways. So while I understand that the light saber will be in his repertoire as I truly see him maybe saving it for the most heinous disrespect, it would make sense to broaden the range of implements in order to lessen the potential for injury. We are on the same page as far as that goes. So now it seems he will be in the market with something that spreads the pain, so an implement with thud versus sting. I have visions of a lovely paddle perhaps from Blondie's Place. Oh no. The next words out of his mouth. "I'd like a cricket bat." Whaaaat???"

So I did what I usually do when I don't have a clue. I googled. Why oh why did I do that? And why is my HOH so creative? Maybe I should try to compromise. A lovely ping pong paddle would be nice. Ooh - and we could get a ping pong table and play. That's a lovely bonus - too lovely to turn down I think! Hmmmm...something tells me that I just need to accept my fate. There's likely a cricket bat in our future. I guess on the positive side, we could bludgeon home intruders with it if need be.

I thought this one that I found looked appropriate for the job.

And one in action. This guy just looks like he's getting ready to paddle his woman's behind!

So I will leave you dear readers with those lovely visions in your head. Be careful what you wish for!